It's really interesting trying to come up with words about Mark. I've always considered myself good with words. In fact, I get paid to be good with words. But for some reason, when it comes to him, my mind draws a blank.
Maybe it's because we've experienced so much together, it's too overwhelming to list it all. Maybe it's because our love matures, develops and evolves everyday, it would be too static and inaccurate with words. Perhaps it's because I love, honor and care about him so much that, I fear, to find words would just cheapen it all.
But I guess now's a better time than ever to try.
When we met, sparks immediately flew. His sense of humor, his charisma, his uncanny ability to make every individual feel like the only person in the room, his intelligence, his wisdom...it was all enough to make me quickly fall in love with him.
I was practically a baby when we met. As a scared little freshman at UCI, I quickly latched onto three girls in my dorms, who would later become some of my closest friends. Two of these girls, Candice & Maria, had an old high school friend who was a sophomore at UCI and it just so happened that he was going to come by to welcome us and show us around. Before he came over, they kept "warning" me about him. "Mark has a lot of charisma," Candice said. "Yeah, people are just drawn to him," Maria added. "So be careful..."
What?! Be careful? Of what?
Well, now I know.
The moment Mark walked into the dorm room with his two friends, he screamed of fun, confidence & a good time. Although we didn't talk much at first, I was drawn to him. Mark will be the first one to tell you that he thought I wasn't interested in him...but in reality, I was scheming to get him to notice me.
Soon after, we were at the freshmen dance surrounded by equally awkward 18-year-olds. As I watched Mark maneuver his way around the dance floor, I remember thinking, OK, who is this guy? He doesn't even dance creepy like the other guys. He had this old-school charm about him. So when we started dancing and he whirled me around, I knew I was his.
And I've been his ever since...
When I think about Elysabeth, or Liz, as I mainly call her, I think about those shots in art movies when an unfocused camera points at the sun between trees and when the shot comes into focus, a wonderfully perfect leaf floats ever so softly to the ground.
When I think about Elysabeth, I think about the night in September of 2006 when I met her and quickly dismissed her because I knew we wouldn't talk. She sat on a bed in a crowded and lively dorm room, soaking in the atmosphere with her wildly gorgeous face and I knew, immediately, that she would not talk to me. Simply put, she was too attractive for me. But, thank God, at the end of the night she danced with me. I also thank God for being a Ratto and being able to groove.
When I think about Elysabeth, I usually can't stop thinking about her.
When I think about Elysabeth, I remember our time in Italy. At moments on that 7-day trip, the easy Italian sun would move slowly over her face successfully revealing to me that she actually was the most beautiful person I had ever met.
When I think about Elysabeth, I think about trudging across campus and in the midst of sorting out college in my head, realizing she had just finished a class and feeling my heart fidget with anticipation. Maybe, oh, just maybe, I would be able to get to see her.
When I think about Elysabeth, I think about style and grace.
When I think about Elysabeth, I think about her nose. It's super sqooshy and super cute.
When I think about Elysabeth, I think about how over our relationship, we were fortunate to understand early on that we needed to grow at the same rate. Even though we were different ages and very immature, we grew together. Maturity came slowly, but it came slowly to both of us, thus, allowing us to enjoy the process…together. Attraction came quick and love followed suit, but genuine vulnerability and trust took time, as it should. And now, when our history runs through my thoughts, I know our future will be wonderful because of who we became, together.
When I think about Elysabeth, and stay with me on this, I think about babies. Tiny little half-Korean babies. Then, I think about their mom and I get shivers. Real shivers. It becomes very apparent that I am marrying the best possible person for the job. I am marrying the mom I want my kids to have. I am marrying the woman I want to take on life with...Total goose bumps when I realize that.
But lately, when I think about Elysabeth, I mostly think about making out with her super sloppily in front of all of you at our wedding! It's gonna be awesome.